Well, he is a nutcase….

CAIRO (AP) - Al-Qaida leader Osama bin Laden has called for the world to boycott American goods and the U.S. dollar, blaming the United States and other industrialized countries for global warming, according to a new audiotape released Friday.

He blamed Western industrialized nations for hunger, desertification and floods across the globe, and called for “drastic solutions” to global warming, and “not solutions that partially reduce the effect of climate change.”

So, is Osama trying to get elected as a Democrat?  Nahhh, I think he just wants to be a Professor at Harvard.

So the President has proposed a $15 billion cut, in the name of being “fiscally responsible.” Color me unimpressed.

The CBO says that the deficit next year will be $1.35 trillion, or about 1000 times more than these cuts. That’s not the budget, that’s the deficit. So “fiscally responsible” means cutting the deficit by 0.1%. This summer, the family’s having a get together in Long Beach, about 200 miles away. To put the cuts in perspective, 0.1% of the trip barely gets me to the end of the block.

Let me just say that the President is an idiot. I come to this conclusion because he clearly thinks that I’m dumb enough to think that this is fiscal responsibility.

Tiger Woods has entered a “sex addiction” treatment clinic in Mississippi.   Yawn… he isn’t a “sex addict” — he’s a plain old cheater. The difference between him and most cheaters is that he has a billion dollars.

Used to be that an addiction required some truly distressing and physically even dangerous symptoms of withdrawal. Then the psychobabblers realized there is real money in it. Marijuana became addictive, porn became addictive, food became addictive, sex became addictive.  But the excuse is handy, the money in the therapy is good (for some) and the word “addiction” has lost its meaning.

If he truly has a psychological problem, he could have quietly gotten treatment in the privacy of his home without anyone ever knowing about it.  But instead, his group of lawyers and p.r. agents and Nike execs got together and made sure the world knew that he had entered a clinic for his “disease”.

That way when he makes his inevitable return to endorsement riches, he can blame his behavior on his “illness” - instead of his immorality.  Well I, for one, ain’t buying it.

Oh, Lordy I feel so sorry for her. That’s horrible! Hilarious, mind you, but horrible nonetheless!

Someone took the “put a bunch of monkeys in a room with typewriters and they’ll write Shakespeare” way too far:

The apes created the movie using a specially designed chimp-proof camera given to them by primatologists. The film-making exercise is part of a scientific study into how chimpanzees perceive the world and each other. …

Over 18 months, a researcher introduced video technology to a group of 11 chimpanzees living in a newly built enclosure at Edinburgh Zoo. … Despite the fact that the chimps had never taken part in a research project before, they soon displayed an interest in film-making.

Funny, after surveying the wasteland that is TV nowadays, that’s how I figured most TV shows were made.  How else to explain “reality” TV, the Jersey Shore or the Lifetime Channel?

The apes are unlikely to have actively tried to film any particular subject, or understand that by carrying Chimpcam around, they were making a film.

Again, demonstrating an uncanny similarity to network television producers.  On the other hand, the film gets much more entertaining when the chimps escape, steal a LandRover and kidnap Jane Goodall.

You keep saying that word.  I do not think it means what you think it means.

Decades ago, poor children became known as “disadvantaged” to soften the stigma of poverty. Then they were “at-risk.” Now, a Washington lawmaker wants to replace those euphemisms with a new one, “at hope.”

Democratic State Sen. Rosa Franklin says negative labels are hurting kids’ chances for success and she’s not a bit concerned that people will be confused by her proposed rewrite of the 54 places in state law where words like “at risk” and “disadvantaged” are used.

The bill has gotten a warm welcome among fellow lawmakers, state officials and advocacy groups.

Of course it’s gotten a warm welcome — this is the greater Soviet of Seattle after all.   No matter how far in the red our state budget is (about $2.6 billion), somehow they’ll find a way to spend even more money on idiotic ideas.  And it’s nearly impossible to vote them out, because the King County Auditor will manage to keep finding new stashes of uncounted ballots.

And doesn’t “at hope” sounds a bit like they’re just shy of…well, “hope.” So they’re really at despair?  Or something…

Personally, I prefer “living in poverty” to refer to people who are, you know, living in poverty. It actually means something. And it’s not a slur. There’s a poverty threshold. When people fall below it they are living in poverty. When they are living in poverty, they are disadvantaged and at risk (of going hungry, of becoming homeless, of dropping out and so on).

Using euphemisms just makes it easier to ignore the problem and, as a result, fails to address those problems.  Changing the words doesn’t change the (very real) problem, and just wastes time and energy.

And the sun rises in the east.  Seriously raise your hand if you are surprised. And then slap yourself on the head for being surprised at this news:

Mark McGwire finally came clean Monday, admitting he used steroids when he broke baseball’s home run record in 1998. McGwire said in a statement sent to The Associated Press on Monday that he used steroids on and off for nearly a decade. …

McGwire said he also used human growth hormone, and he didn’t know if his use of performance-enhancing drugs contributed to some of the injuries that led to his retirement, at age 38, in 2001. …

He repeatedly expressed regret for his decision to use steroids, which he said was “foolish” and caused by his desire to overcome injuries, get back on the field and prove he was worth his multimillion salary. …

McGwire’s decision to admit using steroids was prompted by his decision to become hitting coach of the St. Louis Cardinals, his final big league team. Tony La Russa, McGwire’s manager in Oakland and St. Louis, has been among McGwire’s biggest supporters and thinks returning to the field can restore the former slugger’s reputation.

“I never knew when, but I always knew this day would come,” McGwire said. “It’s time for me to talk about the past and to confirm what people have suspected.”

So McGwire has come clean on the topic. Unfortunately, it is way, way past the expiration date on that confession. As a fan of the sport, what I want is a level playing field.  Not one where some players use performance enhancing drugs, and others don’t.

And by the way, does Roger Maris get his record back?  Seriously, I think that no one who knowingly took steroids should be in the Hall of Fame.  It takes away what should be a level playing field and destroys the integrity of the game.  And their records should be stripped from the books as it’s impossible to know if they would have broken those records without using steriods.  Like Bonds.  Palmeiro.  Pettite. Sosa.  McGwire. Clemons.  Alex Rodriguez.  And a long string of etc. etc. etc.